He left

He was saying that he didnt want her to ger hurt and that’s why he was leaving…that’s the only little bit she understood..she couldnt hear anything else he was saying..she kept saying to herself.”.no this cant be ahppening to me..this is not real…and then as those tears came down her face only then did she realize what had happened…it was all real..it was happening to her…he was going away..he was leaving her…she just kept saying “go just go ..go ..please just go” and he did ..he left…
She just waited where she was for him to come back and say he was only playing like he always did..but he didn’t come he didn’t … and she kept crying ,, crying her heart out…she got up and collapsed on th bed and cried for a long time..grabbed the cochee poo he had given her on her birthday and cried…held a photo of him close to her and cried…
She was so tired .so exhausted ..so weak.. a woman who had lost everything she lived for was bound to be all those things … she went into the bathroom for a shower..and stood under the shower for so long.. crying until her knees gave way and she fell to the floor…she pulled herself close and kept crying …
She build the strength to stand up and make it out of thebathroom into her room..where she changed… she looked like a mess.. her puffy eyes were enough for anyone to realize that she had been crying for hours…she had read somewhere that a a woman is beautiful because you love her… and he didn’t love her …she stood in front of the mirror staring at the woman in front of her..and this woman was not beautiful…as if all her beauty had been taken away in a heartbeat ….
.then her phone rang..she didnt want to answer it she let it ring..once twice ..and then thrice…she finally answered it the fourtht ime..it was her friend.. they had to go out for coffee today…she declined but the friend at the other end wouldn’t listen…she tried to tell her ..but she didn’t know what to say she was still trying to accept wht had really happened..and to avoid any more questions"why are you not going and all" she agreed and said she’ll get to her house in anhour…
She concealed those eyes…those eyes that had cried so much because they wouldn’t see the man they loved so much….a little magic with an eye pencil . covered it up..put on a gloss..wrapped a shawl aroundher .. grabbed the car kleys and was out of the house….
A few friend sgot into her car and few others int the other …they were all giggling and laughing ..and she managed a fake smile every now and then…but then… how long can you restrain the storm that had destroyed everything inside her from reaching the surface....she couldn’t control herself.. as she looked at the road infronto f her…she kept seeing his face..she kept hearing his laugh in her ear..his words.. everything came back to her bit by bit.. and it made her cry … she couldn’t let others see so she rolled dowm the window.. and let the cold December breeze blow her hair into her face… and as an excuse of managing her hair .. pulling it back from her face she could wipe away her tears too and no one would notice ….
They stopped at the coffee house.. ….got out of the cars and walked in..she settled her self on a couch in the corner.., everyone was laughing and telling jokes .. she just leaned her head back and s closed her eyes..she didnt want any of her friends to see the pain that reflected in her eyes… she didn’t..
She ordered oreo vanilla ice cream ,her favorite… she had only a bit ..and she pushed it away.. and she put her head on the table and covered her face …her friends asked her wht was wrong ..but she didn’t say anything.. she just said she was unwell.... the viral flu..................…...she lied….
As they made their way out of the coffee house ..she insisted on going to the beach..so they all did ...when they got there… she left the crowd and walked out on to the beach on her own..she walked along the shore line for a bit and then stopped ..looked into t he ocean.. looked at the waves who she once used to come to and ask to convery her love to her beloved who was so far away from her.. but today she had no message ..she just confided in them ..told them of her pain.. looked up at the sky and the moon looked dim asif it was sad cause she was sad…she was still crying ..this time..more then ever…and then…the heavens opened their doors and the sky cried with her ..in her pain..it rained.. it rained…everything she had loved was with her.. the ocean .the moon.. the rain..but the man who she had loved was no where in her reach ...
Her friend kept calling out her name ,telling her to come back…..but she didn’t want to move she didn’t want to leave the things she loved…she just stood there…until one of her friends..came from behind and pulled her back to the car…she was all wet and was shivering….her friends tuned the heater in the car and she sat in the car…once she gained her senses …her friends showered her with questions ..calling her mad..asking her wht was wrong..and she just laughed and said"you guys know..i love the rain…it was my first alongn the shore line I wanted to enjoy it"….she lied…again….
They got back in the car…and she started driving..this time..everyone was quiet …cause they were tired and it was late …and it was raining outside..everyone fell in to their own little fantasies…while she just sat there accepting her reality…that he was not here with her..he was not going to be here with her when she felt sad..when she needed someone to talk to ..he wont be here to work his charm and make all her worries go away ...he wont be here…and then another army of tears made their way out of her eyes…this time she didn’t care if anyone saw or not…when her friends saw this they asked what had been w rong…and she just said ..i need some time on my own..please just give me some time..and they the good friends they were obliged
She got back home..came back to her room.., changed.. got into her bed and just lay there for what seemed eternity.... with her closed...listening to late Nusrat Fateh Ali khan on her mp3 player and then don’t know when ..but she did finally fall asleep…a few momenst where she would feel nothing.a few momenst when her pain would go away ..a few moments when she would not miss the man who had left...


I called the sun and he answered me
I called the moon and she treasured me
I called the stars and they cried for me
When I called your name only silence came back to me

.I called the earth and she befriended me
I called the sky and she watched over me.
I called the seas and they refreshed me.
When I whispered your name only silence came back to me.

I called the wind and he carried me
I called the fire and he lit for me
I called the birds and they sang for me
When I spoke your name only silence came back to me.

I've seen you leave with my very eyes
but still…I have hope…..